No Cuts When Luck Runs Out

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November 9, 2011 by David Gillaspie

originally posted on oregonsportsnews

What do you tell an old man in a hounds tooth hat sneaking ahead of you in the grocery store Express Line?

You want to say, “Back of the line, pal, just like everyone else. It’s the same express for all of us.”

But you have manners and say, “Sure. Slide right in, sir.”

Part of you wants to ask the rest of the line, “Anyone else want to go ahead of me? Move on up. It’s okay for now. No hurry here.”

But you don’t.

Oregonsports fans know about the pushy old man in a grocery store. His name is Mr.Alabama, and he didn’t even give you a baleful expression when he took cuts, just a superior smile that said, “I know you understand, son. This is how it is in real life.”

Do you hold back now?

This is football and you tell him in your best Bear Bryant, “Back of the line, buddy. Around here you lose, you take the sucker’s walk. This week we’re calling it the 8-1 walk. You can cut into another line, but you may not cut in the BCS line.”

The Tide loses to LSU and drops one spot. WhenOregonlost to LSU they nearly dropped to the NAIA.

 The Detergent can’t get the stain of Mike the Tiger off their home turf, but the talk is already about a ‘Bama rematch in the Bowl Championship Series National Championship. (Side note: Does the BCS scheme lose authority when you spell it out, or is it just me?)

 Mr.Alabamais pushy, and he’s not alone.

IfAlabamais the pushy old man, Mrs. Sooner is his three hundred pound girlfriend smoking a cigarette on her electric scooter in the grocery store parking lot. She runs over a lot of toes and crushes bones and makes no excuses unless you call Coach Stoops’ whining to the refs an excuse.

Now is the time to remind Mrs. Sooner thatOklahomalost to a Texas, though not a directionalTexaslikeNorthTexasState, or an initialTexaslike A &M.

They lost to Texas Tech. Even the school name sounds weak.

Like the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (M.I.T.), a tech school needs the whole name to express a serious nature. Deep in the heart of the bigger, better, louder nature of the Lone Star State, Oklahoma lost to the Texas Institute of Technology and now they’re stuck in the one loss wringer.

Are they the best 8-1 team in the land? No. IsAlabama? No.

At leastOklahomadidn’t lose to the Sam Houston Institute of Technology in their house.

Oregonloses to LSU in the first game of the 2011 season and climbs back to seventh. In the world of 8-1 teams,Oregonis third out of six in the top ten, with the other four living in the land of the undefeateds.

In BCS logic, what happens whenOregonbeats Stanford? Will the Cardinal even budge in the rankings, or drop one spot likeAlabama? Let’s project that Andrew Luck’s team heads to the back of the 8-1 line where they belong, or at least lower than the teams they lose to.

ThenOregonmoves up.

If there isn’t universal agreement thatOklahoma will beatOklahomaState, or change their name to Oklahoma Tech, there will be after the closely scored game. The Cowboys will lose to the Sooners, but not in the unwatchable soccer match that was the 9-6 Game of the Century final.

WhenOregonwins out and the above scenario unfolds, the Boise State Broncos will be broken one more time before heading to the Big East and their BSC slot. An 8-1 team jumps over the ponies at the end of the year. If not, tell LSU Kellen Moore called them soccer players.

The rematch sports fans want, the one college football deserves, is not LSU vsAlabama. If the Tide is paying attention, they’ll take note that the championship game is in LSU’s backyard, the same place they won their last two titles. It’s as neutral a site as Cowboy Stadium was for the LSU vs Ducks game.

Did someone forget Tiger fans know how to drive a few hundred miles?

On top of that you must admit watching the two best SEC teams play was so frightening  you don’t want to see them play anyone from your conference. The beat down they laid on each other last Saturday was enough to turn SEC doubters into believers. That is the home of the bruising brand of football you see on Sundays.

The rematch the football powers need is one that includes the same uniforms combination as LSU and the defending Super Bowl Champion Green Bay Packers.

It’s a rematch of contrasts and style, a rematch with the Oregon Ducks. That’s the game to decide who rules the D-1 schools, not a game of field goals.

This week tells the tale when the Ducks rub the red off the Stanford Cardinal.


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