December 31, 2010 by David Gillaspie
Oregon? oREEgun? or Argon?
A BCS college championship game brings out the linguist in all the fans.
You mutilate strange words equally the first time you hear them, then do it intentionally afterward.
It’s part of the game.
One of those exotic words is eligibility.
The Oregon Ducks will be the only team in college football history to face two of the greatest student/athlete quarterbacks since Vince Young from Texas; two men who share equal confusion of what college football asks of you.
Last year it was Terrelle Pryor, 6′ 6″, 233 lbs of The Ohio State greateness, suspended five games next year for trading awards for tattoos.
This year it’s Cameron “Cam” Jerrell Newton, 6′ 6″, 250 lbs of Auburn Tigerness, who didn’t know his father tried to trade him for church support.
From a player point of view, the confusion is easy to understand. You can get a sportsmanship tattoo, or drop a few bills in the donation plate and it’s all good, or at least good enough.
Just not good enough by college football standards.
That’s the confusing part, apparently, and not the only one.
Oregon is the thirty-third state in the United States of America.
Auburn is a color. You can look, but you won’t find the complimentary school for Auburn. Hazel University isn’t on any map, but keep an eye out just the same.
If you understand why a school is named after a stick of wax in the crayola box, explain why the school picked a jungle cat name for its teams?
How many universities call themselves Ducks? Look to Oregon to end the confusion.
No one asks Auburn to rename themselves after a regional animal like University of Oregon Ducks or Oregon State Beavers. Would the Auburn Snakes or Auburn Bugs be any better than a tiger?
As the January 10th game approaches, look for more clarification between the two schools.